Tips for Getting Over a Breakup

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Hey there my gems,
For my first Wisdom Wednesday, I thought we can dig into something we almost all can relate to, Break Ups. Even if you haven't gone through this, you've had a falling out with someone, a friend, someone you care about that you need to distance yourself from, etc. So here are my tips for getting some clarity and moving forward after a break up or any kind of relationship ending.

1. Clear Mind
Whenever we care deeply about someone, we make excuses for them. Whether it's a small disagreement or a big argument. We tend to make excuses through our rose colored glasses to make the people we love look good. Now is the time to stop that. Go through the relationship and make a mental count of the times that you were mistreated, or really upset and you made excuses for them. Now hold onto those moments, the reality of who they are and how they acted- the truth behind the rose colored glasses. Taking them down from their 'perfection' and back down to reality is a great way to start moving forward.

2. Be mad
Even if your breakup wasn't a nasty one, there is something that deep down is upsetting you. How it ended, why it ended, something they said, their mom said, etc. Find it, and get mad. Le it out, unleash the beast and allow yourself to feel that anger even if you don't know what it's for. This is like the five stages of grief, you need to allow yourself to feel the anger, even if its ambiguous. Anger takes up so much room in your heart and mind, it weighs on you if you keep it in. So please, please, please LET IT OUT.

3. Lists
Lists are honestly my answer to everything at this point, but I swear it works. Make a list of the things you didn't like or the things you learned from the relationship. Anything, big or small, that you now know is important to you or you never want to endure again. Take the pain that you are feeling in the realization that something is over, and turn it into lessons you'll keep forever.

4. Fake it till you make it
Guys, this might not make immediate sense, but hear me out. Fake being okay, fake being happy, fake extra confidence. This is exhausting at first, but when you really allow time to pass, suddenly you realize you actually do feel better, more confident, etc. and you''re not even faking it anymore! When that realization hits, Oh its so, so sweet!

Thanks for reading my gems!
I hope anyone who's feeling hurt right now, knows that they have so many people that love them!
DM me on my blog insta (tiathingsblog) if you need anything else my gems!

T
XX

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